All year you’ve been a good grand-son/daughter. Calling your grandparents frequently, stopping by their house for three-hour lessons on why this economic downturn is fiddlesticks compared to the Great Depression, and even mowing their lawn bi-weekly without even being asked to do so.
Christmas rolls around, and you’re expecting something awesome…maybe a hefty gift certificate to Academy…maybe a Playstation 3 video game…maybe even a copy of Cecil Hurt’s Tradition: The Pride of Bryant-Denny.
On Christmas Day, your grandfather hands you a medium-sized gift, and you are certain what’s inside that tacky holiday wrapping paper is a fabulous token of appreciation for all your hard work and acts of being a wonderful grandchild. You carefully remove the giant red bow without damaging it (because you know your grandmother wants to save it), tear off the wrapping, surgically cut the tape from the box-top (because she wants to hold onto that box too), and pull the top off, anxious to see what lies beneath.
When you discover the box’s contents, your face catches fire, but you force that painful fake smile and breathlessly mutter your best, “Thank you…I love it.” After all that brown-nosing, here’s what you get:
Freaking Purple Socks: Only cool for Tinky Winky and
weird porno scenes
After a 12-1 season in the SEC and a few plays from a national championship berth, the BCS system has awarded Alabama with a trip to the Sugar Bowl…to play freaking Utah. Thanks…Thanks a lot. We love it. Jesus.
No complaints…seriously. Because Alabama NEEDS this Sugar Bowl (it’s been 16 years)…just like you NEED socks. But purple socks? Utah???
Alabama’s BCS bowl bid:
Who: #4 Alabama vs. #6 Utah / Where: Sugar Bowl, New Orleans, La. / When: January 2nd, 2009
A Drug Called Tradition 
Yep, you win … eh, you were supposed to win. You lose? Say hello to Oklahoma vs. Boise for me.
I’m sure the players will look at it differently…as far as preparation…they want to get that Sugar Bowl win and finish ranked in the top-5. But yes, it is a little disappointing they can’t play against a Texas or an Ohio State. Oh well…they’re aiming to be only the second 13-win Alabama team ever.
F it. Someone told me today that this (playing the Utes) was a punch we had to roll with, I found myself asking, “How is this a punch?” I agree that we should be playing OSU or Texas, but hey, I’ll take it. Simple as that. If we had taken care of business on Saturday, we wouldn’t be “rolling with the punch.” We didn’t though, and we’re heading to the Sugar. So be it.