The person at right has no spleen or liver. He also wrestles alligators, eats the glass from old RCA televisions, and lives when he’s supposed to die.
Also, he is the person Alabama All-America tackle Andre Smith was supposed to block…until Smith was forced against his will to talk to talked to an agent and was suspended for Friday’s Sugar Bowl.
“In situations like that he almost goes blind with intensity,” this person’s sister once said about him.
Wait…you’re talking about when he gets stabbed by 15 Latino gang members and has to make an incredible comeback to the game of football, right? You’re not saying he goes BLIND WITH INTENSITY when he plays in Sugar Bowls against SEC teams who just lost their top-5 NFL draft pick, right? Right?
Dear Lord.